Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Dominic Cooper - 11.23-11.43


Here's my first Writing, Writer, Writest story. Did I use correct grammar on that? I don't know. Each word seems kind of important, but I don't want to be unfaithful to the website. I could open up my facebook window again and double check, but I feel like that would eat into my 20 minute timeslot, and my internet connection is... tragically slow at best...

I guess I can write you a story about what's going on in my life right now huh? It has to do with the internet connection, so there's a through line here that I'm sure you'll appreciate. I'm not really a writer by the way... I can already feel the self deprecating hand on my shoulder... Is this what all writers feel? That other people will look at their work and find it utterly mundane? Anyway. My internet connection is slow because my landlady, who lives in the same property as me, has selected the slowest internet setting from AT&T for all the tennants. You could call her money savvy, but it's best to call her, evil. No, that's a bit harsh. She's Austrian. and about 73 years old. And she likes to run the house like an Emily Bronte upper class British mansion circa 1853. She doesn't like electricity. Water's in short supply, and heat for the winter should be supplied by a single log fire in the living room. One of my roommates raised a concern about the heating the other day. My landlady doesn't handle opinions or requests for better living conditions well, and she served him his 30 day notice.

She slid it under his door in the middle of the night. It was a waking up present. We don't know much about California law. But, we're going to fight it. We're pretty sure two of the rooms being rented aren't legal... One was a study and one was a dining room with no electrical outlets. Amazing. Conditions in the house are tense. I feel almost certain that I'll be evicted too because I've taken the side of my roommate and asking for better living conditions isn't really a cause for eviction.

Is this what you wanted? In the 20 minutes? This isn't really a story. It's more of a blog right? I think I should have read the rules through properly. It's 11:34 now. Now I'm wondering if what I've written is a decent amount in the time given. I feel that it is. But I'm not a real writer. Sometimes I type fast and when I mean to write "the", I type "teh"... I've sent frequent emails to important people without spellchecking. I should use spellcheck more often. I even think my hotmail account has a spellchecker now. I remember when it didn't, and you used to have to open up 'Word 97' to copy and paste the body of the email to check it all. Now I feel old. Should I spellcheck this email? Or should I let the Writer, Writer, Writest editor do that? And should that be 'Writer, Writer, Writest'?

The window in my room has cracks around its frame. I can tell the season of the year by the type of insects that are in here. I can tell spring is approaching by the amount of baby beetles that are spawning daily. I tried blocking the gaps with tape. Then I took to spraying bug repellent around the window every other day. Nothing has really worked.

20 minutes is a long time to type without a mission. I'm going to spellcheck now. At 11.41pm. That will give me time to correct anything.

Hmmm... seems that Spellcheck is actually two seperate words. Who knew? Look at me defying the correction.

It's 11.43pm. You're welcome.


  1. "I can already feel the self deprecating hand on my shoulder... Is this what all writers feel?"

    Almost universally, yes.

  2. I agree with Josh. I've actually gone back and read some things I've written and thought "gee, this is trash, no wonder no one reads it."

    But judgement really rests in those who read, not write. Isn't that right?

  3. "Hmmm... seems that Spellcheck is actually two seperate words. Who knew? Look at me defying the correction." (love it)

    You say you are not a writer, but indeed you are. I look forward to more of your works.